Keri Hilson — “Pretty Girl Rock” (from No Boys Allowed) — Pretty Girl Rock - No Boys Allowed (Deluxe)

I’m not a girl, and my degree of prettiness is continually up for debate, so you’d have to figure that, as is the case with most other tunes of this particular stripe, this standard-issue female empowerment anthem would pass right by me without incident. And yet, how can you possibly resist Hilson here, Rock-ing in full-on diva-next-door mode, particularly on this track’s knockout opening minute, which finds Miss Keri scatting and strutting her way through a ferociously frisky reintroduction to the music world at large. (I’m being quite sincere when I tell you that, using this song’s elegantly electrifying Keri / very / scary / dairy-air rhyme scheme as a template after listening to it on a non-stop loop, I’ve spent the past couple of months trying to come up with a similar verse that utilizes my own name as brilliantly and easily as “Pretty” uses hers —
My name is Brandon / I’m so… (candid? landlocked? Mirandized?) — and, thus far, have come up with bupkes. But what I do know is this: why this isn’t the biggest smash at top 40 radio right now and mopping the floor with that ratty-haired trashy tart Ke$ha and her decidedly non-pretty brand of petri-dish pop is the head-scratcher of this still-young new year.)

1 response to “fly, o my, it’s a li’l bit scary
(or: march 22’s honey from the hive)”

  1. the buzz from A.:

    To put it simply, Keri Hilson’s “Pretty Girl Rock” is a fun little song residing in the same realm as Matisse’s “Better Than Her” and Orianthi’s “According to You.” Indeed, the rhyming scheme is catchy, but the repetitious line “Don’t hate me ‘cause I’m beautiful” is driving me nuts. Judging by past experience with Matisse and Orianthi, I am sure that Keri (with all her rhymes) will eventually find her way into my iTunes, especially if Brandon keeps singing it to me. Now if only I had the same effect on him with Lady Gaga!

    As for the rhyming scheme challenge, I too come up only with bupkes.